Ally McBeal was a one of my favorite TV shows about 15 years ago...I remember very little about why I loved the show but I remember this: Ally McBeal had a theme song for her life and I wanted one too (hers was accompanied by a crazy ghost baby...that part I definitely don't want). I related to her goofiness, lack of confidence, desire to prove her worth, her fight to be authentic, slightly neurotic, OCD and paranoid personality with a fear of almost everything, and yet determination to do it all anyway. She was wildly popular so I can only assume these are universal feelings of women (or possibly humans in general).Since then I have gathered my own 'go to' theme songs that I need to pump me up when needed, mostly to be brave when I'm scared out of my wits, which is more often than I care to admit. I had a day last week that I had to show up and be brave, declare my worth, and do it with confidence and enthusiasm, basically be a cheerleader for myself, no one else could do it...that's a lot to ask of an introvert.
I started the day with my favorite TED Talk by Amy Cuddy Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are and then moved on to hula hooping to some of my favorite brave woman songs:
I Am Woman by Helen Ready, one of the most influential women of her time. She was my mentor as a child, even though I didn't know what a mentor was, I listened to her record over and over while dancing my little heart out. Where is she now? Still a great mentor, I love her perspective and way of living now: Helen Ready Today
Brave by Sarah Bareilles, you have to watch the video for the full impact...my favorite lines which always makes me cry:
I Will Survive, literally this song kept me going through my divorce, I sang it ALL.THE.TIME...and I did survive! It still works...I still sing it...I'm still surviving.
Bad Romance Woman's Suffrage by Lady Gaga, again the video needs to be watched for the full impact...gives me goosebumps to remember what women have been through to give me the right to vote, work, own property, be paid equally and numberless other rights we have today...and yes, even today we still fight for equality. This song has really been helpful to me this past few weeks as I negotiated for myself...not an easy thing for me to do. My hubby gave me this shirt a few years ago to help me psych myself into the empowerment that I needed in my life...I wore it at my girls retreat last week as I prepared my mind and heart for being a brave woman who fights for herself when I got home, FEMINIST as FUCK, yep I am. I appreciate my hubby's constant support of my life in his own goofy way. The video about this song being made is also worth the watch Behind the Scenes . Would I have been brave enough to fight alongside these brave women not that long ago?Happy by Pharrell Williams Because at the end of the day, being happy is important and whatever happens happens, so just try to be happy and enjoy what you have in life. This song just helps me relax about all the stuff I fret about. I love this slideshow of the CSUSM graduating class if 2014 with the song. It's a great reminder of the difference in my life because I did go back to school and get a degree (it only took me 25 years to finish), it really helped my career and my confidence, post divorce. My favorite VIP is also in it, he hired me in my last two positions (and is now Provost) which has had a huge impact on my life and career...I will always feel great appreciation for the hand he's played in my life...he's also just an all around great guy, boss and mentor (reminds me a lot of my dad who I miss a lot). He's in the red graduation gown at 1:09 and 2:28.
However, after all this pumping up, empowering and gratitude, I was sobbing like a baby and went through the day with crying eyes...but they were good crying eyes and I did what I needed to do, I was BRAVE, which made me HAPPY, and I felt JOY.
